Friday, August 24, 2012

Too many excuses, not enough work...

My mileage so far this week has been awful. So awful that I've come up with an excuse for it. Are you ready?

I probably should be tapering anyways so I don't kill all of my energy before Disneyland next weekend.

Good excuse or poor excuse, I'm not sure, but I'm embarrassed. There is no excuse for me not wanting to do my runs, but I just haven't wanted to. I haven't felt like it. Awful, right?

First, I'm dog sitting. This is Finn (and Katherine):

Don't get me wrong. I love dogs. Finn is one of the most laid back dogs that I have ever met. Yet, I find myself feeling bad for leaving him alone for periods of time, because I know he's already stressed out that his dad went on a cruise without him. He also wakes me up before I want to wake up because he needs to go outside. Generally, he's a great dog, though, so I'm lucky as far as that goes. I'm also staying at Finn's (Seth's) apartment right now. That means new running routes that I have to figure out on my own. Another excuse.

Along with that, I've been missing this face for the past week:

On Wednesday, my car wouldn't start. A new alternator and new battery later, I have Lola the car back, but not without a hefty bill. Just what I needed.

Yesterday, class started for me for the semester! Woo hoo! I'm so close to my Masters, I can almost feel it. I'm just exhausted and stressed out about it already. I have really high expectations for myself this semester. I know that I CAN do it. I just need to push myself hard enough to do it. I'm also REALLY stressed about finding a full time job in my field. I don't even know where to begin my search.

So. Much. Stress.
So that's why I've been slacking. Those are all of the excuses that I've been running through my head. I already know I won't be doing my 20 miler on Sunday. I'm planning to cut it to like... 9 or 10, because of time constraints and a semi-taper before California. Ugh.

I'm drained.

I did four miles on Tuesday after work and four miles today before work. I guess that's something.

Goal: 1000 miles/366 days
So far: 530.15 miles/237 days
To go: 469.85 miles/129 days

Monday, August 20, 2012

Crazy 18 mile training run

Let's talk about long run day. Again.

18 miles.
Did I mention that I've never followed a training plan before? For ANY of my races in the history of my running life (three years). Never ever. I've decided that I was going to do it and then just not followed through many times. (ten half marathons, two full marathons, one 10k, and several 5ks)

This time I'm following a plan. (minus when my toe was smashed and I was put out of commission for a few days) I almost didn't. I didn't want to do 18 miles today. I couldn't sleep last night and woke up after about 4-5 hours, thinking that 18 sounded horrible. I was tired before I started and that just sucked. A lot.

Kath and I ran together, thank goodness. I'm not 100% sure that I could have done it without her. Somehow, we did it though. Kath had never run further than 14 miles in her life and, like I said, outside of a race, I've never run that distance before. It was rough, to be honest. Beyond rough. I'm drained and exhausted and my legs still feel like they are on fire.

But we did it! We got stuck in a crazy storm for a while and we had to stop at Publix and wait it out. There was no way that I was going to risk crazy lightning. It was good though. Sort of like cheating, but not really. You have to do what you have to do in times like that. I felt AWESOME between miles 4-15. When I got to 15.5-16, I started to feel miserable. It's sort of like the emotional stuff that I've gone through during the marathons that I've run. I get these really intense highs and lows, but I think that's normal(ish). It's at least normal during a race. I'm not sure that I like it though.

I am sort of elated that I finished my run today. Next week's long run is 20 miles. I do NOT have my mind wrapped around that at this time. Wow.........................

(plus, I've joined the work softball time plus my class starts this week.)

Goal: 1000 miles/366 days
So far: 522.01 miles/233 days
To go: 477.99 miles/133 days

Friday, August 17, 2012

short & sweet 3 miler

Where does all of the time go in this life? I feel like this day just started, but in an hour, I'll be clocking in at work. That's insane to me. I don't understand how it all happens.

I don't really have time to write about today's run. It was rainy, but not scary stormy. I ran semi-quickly. A little over 12 minute miles, which is good for me, especially considering how awfully slow that I have been lately. Every day, I am getting better, regardless of how freaked out I am about Chicago. I have many MANY races to worry about before Chicago happens.

Anyways, just over three miles at just over a 12 minute pace. I'll take it.

Goal: 1000 miles/366 days
So far: 504 miles/230 days
To go: 496 miles/136 days

(p.s. oh wow! I didn't realize that I evened out my numbers today!)

Thursday, August 16, 2012

celebrating 500 miles in 2012! (so far!)

So this is crazy! I'm officially past 500 miles for the year. I'm SO excited about it. So. SO. excited. I know that I'm late for the year and I'm past the  month mark, but I really feel like I can get to the mileage that I want to get to. (that being 1000 miles in one year. which lots of people have done for many years.)

Yesterday, I ran with Seth for the first time in the history of ever. We didn't take any pictures while running to post to the blog (oops), but it was fun! I was really nervous, because I haven't run with anybody besides my mom and Katherine. I am always pretty self conscious about my pace, especially when I'm running with someone that I know is faster than me. We worked really well together and I had a lot of fun! I'm really excited about it and next time, I won't have to be nervous about running with Seth! haha. (but I will definitely continue to be nervous about running with other people. beyond him. and Kath.)

We ran 8 miles, so we both felt pretty much like beasts afterwards. That's because we are beasts. But ya know.

Today, I was thinking about pushing my run off until tomorrow, because I didn't get much sleep and was beyond tired. However, my computer was acting up, so I went. I did 9 miles in a 14:50-ish pace, which I'm really proud of, because it was terribly hot outside. So yeah. That is really fun news! My legs are a little tired, but I mostly feel awesome right now.

I'm still terrified about Chicago, but I'm also feeling really awesome about how my training is going. My pace is a little awful all of the time, but I think that part of the problem is that I have been worn out and the heat in Central Florida is really tough to run in. What worries me the most is that I'm starting toward the end of Chicago so there is potential that it could be REALLY warm outside. That freaks me out, honestly. I know the midwest and I know that early October in the midwest could be nice or awful. We'll find out.

I'm SO excited to be at 500 miles. Yeeeah me!

Goal: 1000 miles/366 days
So far: 500.78 miles/229 days
To go: 499.22 miles/137 days

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

running in the rain.

I feel like time is going by so quickly and slowly at the same time. I'm so confused about what day of the week it is. All. Of. The. Time. So today was back to running after yesterday's rest day. I was slated for 4 miles-easy.

I decided that I was going to try to do my 4 miles at a 2/1 interval pace. I've never done intervals before and I'm running with Seth for the first time tomorrow and we're doing 2/1 intervals. I wanted to make sure that I can do it. It was going really well until the clouds started rolling in. I saw them and thought that I should continue running, because I wanted to get the mileage in. Then the thunder started. That's when I thought it was probably time to turn around. At the same time, if I went a quarter of a mile further, I knew I'd be able to get the four miles in. So I kept going.

By the time I finally turned around, there was zero reason for me to keep trying to do intervals. I killed it running home. I sprinted, took short walk breaks, and sprinted more. Serious speedwork, except it was mostly because I didn't want to get killed by lightning. At one point, there was lightning striking in front of me, behind me, and beside me.

Did I mention that my two biggest fears in the world are storms and seagulls? When I was in third grade, a tornado touched down nearby my school. I remember the power going out to the school and all of the students freaking out. We all prayed together (Catholic School), including our principal, Sr. Alice Marie. I have never been the same since. No joke. I hate storms. They make me nervous and afraid and I turn into a 9 year old again. Every time.

So I was running in the midst of (one of) my biggest fear(s). I prayed. And sprinted. I made it home in one piece, too. I was drenched in rain and felt gross and terrified. I completed my four miles, though. My pace was 12:20 minute miles. I'm amazed with myself. I was stuck in a 14-15 minute mile pace funk and now I'm out. I can do really awesome things.

I just have to face my fears.
Wow, that was cheesy!

Goal: 1000 miles/366 days
So far: 483.34 miles/227 days
To go: 516.66 miles/139 days

Sunday, August 12, 2012

...something to say about motivation.

I don't really have time to write. I have to leave for work in five minutes or so. Blah. (Did I tell you that I don't like working at night? Because I don't. It annoys me.)

Today Kath and I ran together. We did a little over eight and a half miles. It was really tough. For the first time outside of a race, I thought I was going to throw up. I've never felt sick during a training run before. I didn't even push myself too hard. I'm not sure what the problem was with my body. My breakfast was healthy and pretty light (a bagel with peanut butter and a slice of turkey ham). Ijust felt miserable. The. Whole. Time.

There's something to say for motivation though. I pulled it out in the end. I cut my average pace from 16 to 15:30 in the last three miles. (I'm really unhappy with that pace.) I'm glad I found the motivation to push past my barriers and move forward. I think that's pretty awesome.

I just wish I didn't have to dig so deep sometimes.

Goal: 1000 miles/366 days
So far: 479.34 miles/225 days
To go: 520.66 miles/141 days

Saturday, August 11, 2012

positives and negatives on long run day.

Long run day recap. Again.

Let's start with the positive things that happened during my run today... First, I ran the distance that I needed to. Though my toe is still swollen, it doesn't hurt at all when I'm running and only hurts some when I'm walking around. (I think that it mostly depends on what shoes that I am wearing. My work shoes are awful at squishing my toes. Ugh.) I'm ecstatic that I'm running again. I'm pleased that I only had to take a week off before I could run again. I'm glad that I did fourteen miles today. It takes a lot of mental strength to push it that hard and for that long. Yay for me.

I just wish that it was easier. I struggled a LOT today. My legs felt heavy and slow from the very beginning. I'm not sure how I ended up getting all of the miles in. I guess that I pushed it pretty hard, but my pace was way slower than I would have wanted it to be. ...frustrating. I KNOW that I can run faster and better than I ran today. I just don't know why I didn't do it today. I know that I should be pleased that I got the mileage that I needed, but I feel like my pace is pretty important, too.

I'm less than two months away from Chicago. I'm about three weeks from Disneyland. Then Tower of Terror 10 miler, then Chicago, then Wine & Dine, then the Jacksonville Distance Classic, then the Orlando Half, then Goofy (Dopey)! This is crazy. I just really want to make sure that my body is ready for all of this. I'm not sure that it is, because of tough runs like I had today. Frustrating...

I know that I can run the distance. I just want to get my pace to where I need it to be. I'm just feeling a little stuck right now, I guess. I don't know what the answer is... the magical motivation that I've been looking for.

I'm at a completely different sport than where I was last year at this time. My body is different and my training is so muh better. Frankly, I have no idea what my race pace might be. It has to be something better. I feel like I'm looking PRs in the face, I just don't know what they would be.

I'm also planning on adding personal training back into my regimen. I need it desperately. I can't find the motivation to strength train on my own. Another frustration...

Kath & I at 13 miles. Today was her furthest run in the history of her life!

Goal: 1000 miles/366 days
So far: 470.74 miles/224 days
To go: 529.26 miles/142 days

Thursday, August 9, 2012

3 cheers for being back to running.

I ran! (two days in a row!) I'm really excited about it.

I thought I was going to have to modify my distance in order to help work through the pain in my toe, but my toe really doesn't hurt at all when I run. I actually decided not to tape my toes today, because it seems like my foot is strained and I limp much more when I tape my toes together. The smushed toe is still swollen, but most of the bruising is gone now. I feel so much better. It's crazy how sad I was about my toe being injured. I thought I was going to have to lose a lot of my training in the next several days. Instead, I lost 3-4 days of training.  Yeah me!

So yesterday, I did four miles. It was the first run I'd done in a week and I felt great. It was awesome. I ran slowly, but I did what needed to be done. That's what really matters.

Today, I was scheduled 8 miles and I knew that I could do it. I did two miles, then Katherine came home from work and we finished out together. We had lots of good talks along the way. One fun thing about Katherine and I running together is that our pace has improved exponentially in the past few months. It used to be that we were pretty slow together and walked a lot. Now we can run much more quickly than we could before, so I'm excited about that. Lots of fun teamwork.

I'm exhausted, so that's all I have to say this time. ha. I'm just glad to be back!!

Goal: 1000 miles/366 days
So far: 456.66 miles/222 days
To go: 543.34 miles/144 days

Sunday, August 5, 2012

i have toe woes...

I guess I should write about... why I haven't been running.

On Thursday, at work, I was pushing drink carts out.. and one thing led to another and my toes got run over.. by a 300-400 pound cart full of drinks and ice.

Yup. My pinkie toe was smushed and is now purple-ish (actually the bruises aren't so bad now). I'm pretty sure it was broken in the incident, but knowing that there's nothing that can medically be done for a broken toe, I've buddy taped it to my ring-finger-toe (is that even a real thing?!) and refrained from running. Since Thursday.

I've been crabby, irritable, mean, and in bad spirits since. I'm worried about my marathon training and about all of my races coming up. I'm trying to pray my toe better. I've been lazy and stayed off it. It has been miserable. I've gone from running 5 times a week to laying around. ALL THE TIME. No joke.

So yes. Chicago training has stopped. For now. I'm going to start using my spin bike as much as I can and lifting weights. I've also looked into buying a good bike that I can use. (I can't afford that.) I've also thought very seriously about swimming. The only problem is that... swimming uses feet. Feet have toes. My toes hurt. So... I don't know about that.

...we'll see. I'm hoping that I'm exponentially better by.. tomorrow.

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

motivation means improvement

I had a really fantastic run today. I think that the new shoes really helped. A lot. They're super light and my feet felt light and like they weren't really doing anything. It was fantastic. I ran at about a 13:30 pace for the majority of my run (like... all but one mile), which is my racing pace, so I was (and am!) really excited about it.

I was supposed to do 8 miles today. I ended up doing nine. I felt good enough to do an extra lap around my apartment complex when I got home, so I did. I walked it so that it was more of a cool down, which is where my pace really slowed down a lot. That pushed me to almost nine miles. I figured that I might as well finish out the nine, since I was already almost there. So I did.

I ended up with just over nine miles and at a 14 minute pace. I know that, under many standards, that is extremely slow, but I'm pleased. Sometimes I don't feel like going running, I don't always feel like pushing myself, but I still do it. I do feel like that is an accomplishment. I pushed it out there today. I know that I could be faster and I know that my racing speed is at least a minute quicker than my training pace. I think that if I continue to hold onto it like this, continue to push through, I'm going to improve exponentially into a runner that I want to be. I've been really focused on improving that I haven't noticed the improvements that I've made. A few months ago, an eight mile run would have made me cry and I would have run it at a 15-something pace, just because I would have taken it easy.

I'm proud of who I am becoming. I do feel like running is shaping me.
(and I kinda like it.)

Goal: 1000 miles/366 days
So far: 444.6 miles/214 days
To go: 555.4 miles/152 days